essays, stories and journaling by slegg
contact: to.slegg@gmail.com

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Another day

at work where my boss took issue with my "tone." This time I did the equivalent of flipping her off, which just proved her point. The worst thing she said: I ought to cover my authenticity with inauthenticity, should I suspect someone might be offended by the tone of my authentic feelings. It should be enough to walk away knowing myself. I shouldn't need for others to understand me as well.

She asked if I might have issues with authority, and I said, "Yeah, I'm punk rock to the core!" I'm becoming more inappropriate every day. I don't remember how to be appropriate.

It doesn't help that I've rekindled my passionate love affair with Stephen Elliott's writing. Folks may categorize him however they want, but for me, it's always been about the complications of memory = fact. If all history is memories, and memories don't equal facts, how can we ever know what truly happened? Moreover, does it matter? His writing is non-fiction and factual and truthful ... At the same time, it's possible that his stories are entirely made-up.

2 comments:

Morgan, Hi! said...

There are certain jobs that pay you to be yourself, and certain jobs that pay you to play a role. You've found yourself in the latter position.

I don't think it's that you don't remember how to be appropriate [where appropriate / (women in the workplace) = considering how the person you're speaking to would prefer to receive information]. It's that you were never appropriate, which is why you're my friend, but that don't bring home the turkey bacon ... yet!

I don't know if this has anything to do with anything, but I wonder how many men in your company are asked to consider their tone.

And truth and reality are subjective, you fucking rgst major.

slegg said...

"...I wonder how many men in your company are asked to consider their tone."

Totally right on. You're not the first person who has said this.

I'm starting to look elsewhere ...

Stay tuned for a post on corporate culture fads in communication. I think were entering a new era.