More about Dolphins

I mean, don't you want to hear more about Dolphins? I know I do ...

My mom and I were in Rite Aid, and she pointed to this ridiculous dolphin statue. Something like this:



Only, there was a button on the front that, when pushed, played ocean noises and dolphins squawking. My mom joked to my dad that he should buy it for her for her upcoming birthday.

My dad didn't realize it was a joke, and he did buy it for her. She opened the box, and started crying ... and I couldn't hold in my laughter. My dad was devestated ... He's made my mother cry from gift giving a couple of times. The other time was on their first Christmas together. She'd given him all of her gifts, and he handed her an envelope with a $100 bill inside.

It must be really hard to make someone cry when you want to see them happy. Like, when you send your Venezuelan husband a picture of a beautiful fall tree, and he thinks your making fun of him because he hates the cold ... not that that's ever happened to me. Just saying.

A friend of mine said that it doesn't matter your intention when you do things ... it only matters how it's received. I'm starting to see how that is played out. It's really the old adage: "The path to hell is paved with good intentions." What sucks is that everyone feels like the victim ... the person who was hurt, along with the person who did the hurting.

I think there are more situations like this than we let on. Where both people feel wronged. Both feel that it is unfair. My mom should have known better than to joke about dolphins to my father. And my father should have known better than to give a screeching dolphin statue to my mother. We all should know better, but we don't.

My friend Bed-Stuy has an amazing 'zine called "You Should Know Better." Available at Blue Stockings Bookstore in the LES. Or you can email me and I'll send you a copy.

Love.